By Perminus Wainaina
I am defeated in every aspect of my life to move forward. My passion and commitment are dying by every day. I see no ray of hope ahead.
I am 35 years old. I used to work in the Procurement Industry as soon as I graduated almost 14 years back. For the past two years, I have been jobless, leaving me with around 12 years of working experience.
For the past few months, I have been looking for a job desperately. I would say I am not completely outdated nor up to date in my field of work. I confidently can be able to work on any given project in my scope of skills. But the problem is I am not even getting a chance now, to prove myself at least once. I have attended few interviews recently but did not receive feedback after the interview.
This is making me feel down every day. I am on the verge of seeing no hope anytime soon and my future is bleak to me.
I am financially broken completely and in no way will be able to support my family further ahead.
I am not looking for any sympathy nor any financial support. I am looking for someone who can trust me, so that the passion and commitment that I have, can be displayed for the work.
Please help me, to see a future ray of hope. Please help me to stand by myself.
Jacky (with her permission), allowed me to share this message she sent me, wanting to know how to get back up after feeling defeated.
Have you been feeling defeated and frustrated? You are not alone.
Things don’t always work out as planned, and as a result, you may feel beat down and sometimes downright downtrodden.
Is it possible to look at challenges and failures as the foundation to personal growth and excellence?
The good news it is! There are proven ways to help take back power. It’s not possible to continually win without experiencing a loss, and the way we react to failure is what defines us.
Here are ways to help you bounce back from feeling defeated—and possibly become even stronger, wiser, as you move forward.
1. Find Yourself a Mentor
Every situation you find yourself in has been experienced by someone before you, so learn from that.
Having a mentor reduces stress and helps you both practically understand how to handle the situation and emotionally put things in perspective. It also helps remind you that you’re not alone.
A mentor can be anyone from your friends, colleagues, your boss, or even a career coach. Whoever you choose, ensure that you can be vulnerable with them.
2. Enhance Your Skills
Like Jacky who felt like her skills were not up to date, you can constantly update your skills depending on your profession.
There are various free courses that allow you to learn and even get a certificate at the end of the course that you can add to your CV.
If, for example, you are in sales, you might consider taking up this free Sales & Marketing course that will enhance your skills.
Seek to learn what you can because the knowledge will come in handy.
3. Shift your mindset
When you’re feeling defeated by life, you could be misled into believing that what you possess is limited.
What you don’t know, however, is that your mindset can either limit or drive you. If you believe that you can achieve your goals by advancing your skillset, you will achieve more as you focus on learning and taking action towards your goals.
Developing a ‘can do attitude’ allows you to look at obstacles as stepping stones for personal growth.
4. Take Small Steps Forward
You may want to get back up on your feet and set out to chase all your goals when you’re feeling defeated. However, to ensure that you don’t go from zero to 100 and back to zero again, pick one goal and ask yourself, “what’s the one thing I absolutely can do?” (It could be signing up for a course). Then, if that goes well, keep taking small, incremental steps toward your final goal.
Start by breaking your goals into smaller sections and further into sets of actionable daily tasks that you can track periodically. Small wins and the constant motivation they give will consequently boost your confidence.
You may be surprised to find that these small successes executed daily can lead to breakthroughs.
In The End,
It’s important to understand that pain and suffering from failures in life don’t define you and that the ability to claim back power lies within you. Directing consistent efforts towards assuming this inherent power can help you avoid the mental trap of frustration, allowing you to grow and realize your true potential.
Perminus Wainaina is the C.E.O and Managing Partner at Corporate Staffing Services, a leading HR consultancy firm based in Westlands. Through career mentorship programs, he assists mid-level and senior professionals get solutions to complex and challenging career issues that they are facing.N.B: Would you like us to consider you for a job opening? Boost your job search. Upload Your CV Here. It's FREE